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<div class="chap-title">
8. Chapter 8
</div>
<div class="chap-text">
<p><em>This chapter is quite important and will finally get the ball rolling some
more. I know that many of you have been waiting for some more discord and angst and
such and this is the prelude to some of that awesome drama.</em></p>
<hr size="1" noshade="noshade"/>
<p class='c1'><strong>Chapter 8</strong></p>
<p>It was nearly two whole weeks later when Harry deemed his theorem worthy of
inspection. As instructed, it had opened with a hypothesis of his idea.</p>
<p>"… <em>I have encountered death and its following misery more times than I can
count, not only in my own life but in that of others as well. The wounds of war are
far more than just physical and the wizarding world is only starting to develop an
understanding of what that entails just now. I wish to help people who have been
unable to move on after losing a loved one and believe that communicating with the
person they lost might benefit them greatly. I know that it would help me.</em></p>
<p>He explained how he wanted to achieve this result. He had done the math as best he
could. He had listed all ingredients as well as their counters should they be
necessary and he created the chemical formula that went with the recipe. Harry felt
that he was ready to start brewing the potion. After all, it could not improve
without the much needed practical trial and error.</p>
<p>So he had finished the theorem with the conclusion that if all went well, the end
result would be to communicate with the souls of the departed through the typical
senses of sound and sight but also through touch and even smell. After all, had he
himself not always longed to be hugged by his mother?</p>
<p>Harry contemplated if he should wait for Snape to come to meet him in the lab but
since they hadn't actually agreed to meet, he decided to just go to Snape's private
quarters and present him with his work. So he made the very short trip, and politely
knocked on the door, his hands trembling with anticipation.</p>
<p>"Enter," Came Snape's usual response. Harry opened the door and looked at Snape
who was reading the Daily Prophet with an almost bored expression on his face.</p>
<p>"What can I do for you, Harry?" he asked without even looking up.</p>
<p>"I think I've finished my theorem," Harry said, feeling somewhat giddy, "And I was
wondering if you'd be willing to look it over to approve me for the practical
follow-up."</p>
<p>A small smile graced Snape's features for the better part of a second before he
put down the newspaper and held out his hand.</p>
<p>"I could do with some more interesting reading," he sighed, "It would seem as if
the writers for The Daily Prophet are becoming less and less competent. Go on and
hand it over."</p>
<p>Harry thrust the sheets of parchment forward with a bit more force than was
necessary causing him to lose the last few pages that weren't held firmly in
place.</p>
<p>"Sorry," Harry mumbled as he ducked and clumsily picked up the pages from where
they landed. He handed them over to Snape who added them to the back of the theorem,
shaking his head in mild amusement.</p>
<p>"There's no need to be so nervous," he said in a calm voice, "I am here to assist
and guide you, not to shoot your ideas down."</p>
<p>Harry relaxed somewhat and waited with his hands clasped behind his back.</p>
<p>Snape sighed heavily. "Take a seat and keep yourself occupied, Harry," he ordered,
"Judging by the length of this, I will be reading for a long while. And I will not
have you staring at me while I do so."</p>
<p>"Of course, sir," Harry agreed. He grabbed one of Snape's potions books one
Harry had already read several times and curled up in the chair next to the
fireplace.</p>
<p>Snape chuckled and started reading, expertly ignoring the glances Harry chanced
every now and then.</p>
<hr size="1" noshade="noshade"/>
<p>It quite literally took hours for Snape to get through Harry's theorem. His face
had not once betrayed his thoughts and it was driving Harry mad. He had finished with
the book some time ago and was quickly overcome with boredom. And yes, that was a
welcome change from the anxiety he had been feeling for those first thirty minutes
Snape had been reading but he wanted to get this over with already.</p>
<p>In his mind, he went over his idea several times, hoping that Snape would not find
too many faults with it and allow Harry to further his studies. He had been working
on the theory for months now, after all, and was just itching to start throwing those
ingredients together and see a result. As a manner of speaking, of course. He would
never haphazardly throw ingredients together. Not anymore, at least.</p>
<p>Finally, Snape cleared his throat and Harry looked up from the spot on the table
he had been staring at vacantly, meeting Snape's cold, calculated expression.</p>
<p>"First of all, I would like to impress upon you the importance of the presentation
of your theorem," Snape spoke.</p>
<p>Harry frowned, not interested in such things at all but waited and listened
politely.</p>
<p>"I see that you have utilized the standard parchment that is commonly used in this
school," Snape pointed out. "While fine for common homework and notes, your theorem
especially that of a Magnum Opus should always be produced on decent parchment. In
fact, having grown up in a muggle household, I am certain that you're aware of the
existence of paper. While the wizarding world is generally behind when it comes to
appreciating the inventions of the common muggle, when it comes to important tasks
such as these, we make grateful use of their craftiness."</p>
<p>Harry had to keep himself from rolling his eyes. Instead, he calmly said: "Use
paper, not parchment. Understood."</p>
<p>Snape smirked at him but didn't comment.</p>
<p>"Furthermore, the terminology you used is far too complicated," Snape continued,
"If it were for my eyes only, that would be fine but you need to remember that when
you publish a theorem, more people than potioneers will read it. A master in
herbology, for instance, might take great interest and in your case, I might even
suggest that a seer might deem this a compelling read. Therefore, you have to make
this easier to understand."</p>
<p>"Dumb it down," Harry snorted, "got it."</p>
<p>"Watch the cheek, brat," Snape chided lightly this time. He sighed and
continued.</p>
<p>"You must remember that this is a scientific text. Therefore, you should avoid
using opinions and emotional sentences above all else. Otherwise, you come across as
biased from the start and will not be taken seriously."</p>
<p>Harry nodded in understanding, still waiting anxiously for any comment about the
contents of the theorem rather than the surrounding technicalities.</p>
<p>"I've noticed that your arithmetic skills leave much to be desired," Snape droned
on relentlessly, "I've encountered three major errors that would leave your potion
inert at best and cause mass destruction at worst. Furthermore, you didn't specify
the thickness or the type of cauldron one should use for this potion nor the material
of the accompanying stirrer. You added the use of a spell in the potion but didn't
specify how the spell works or how one goes about casting it. Especially since you're
using a spell that is not well known, it is of crucial importance that you do
so."</p>
<p>Harry's confidence had been decreasing more and more over the course of Snape's
carefully structured criticism and by the end, he didn't have much hope left. Yet he
still dared to ask.</p>
<p>"Could I start brewing it while I rework the theory? As soon as I've worked out
the math properly, of course."</p>
<p>Snape regarded Harry carefully, making the boy feel like some sort of rare and
valuable potion ingredient. A flicker of sadness marred the stoic appearance Snape
was trying to convey, if only for a second before he spoke again.</p>
<p>"Out of the question," Snape said, "In fact, I believe that this potion should
never be attempted, even when the theorem is perfected. It is dangerous not to
mention quite dark. Even when you manage to brew it, I can only imagine the
devastating effects this will have on the drinker's psyche. I cannot condone this."
Snape sighed deeply. "I suggest you start from scratch and come up with something
less… controversial."</p>
<p>"How can you say that?" Harry bellowed, his temper quickly taking hold of him,
"I've been working on this for months! It's not dark. It's supposed to help
people!"</p>
<p>"Harry "</p>
<p>"No!" Harry interrupted, "You're supposed to be so great. You could probably think
of something to help me realize this. I know you could! But of course, you don't! Why
would you when you obviously can't even face my mother!"</p>
<p>Harry grabbed his theorem and stormed out of the door, leaving a befuddled Snape
behind. He regretted what he said immediately but was too upset to go back and
apologize. He had put so much time and work in this! And it took Snape only a couple
of hours to decide that he was inadequate and not allowed to brew his creation.</p>
<p>Upset, he ran all the way to the Gryffindor tower and stormed into the common room
where Ron, Hermione and Ginny were sat.</p>
<p>"Harry," Ginny said, getting up as soon as she saw how upset Harry was. "Are you
okay?"</p>
<p>"No," Harry snapped, "Snape says I can't make my potion!"</p>
<p>"Oh Harry," Hermione said soothingly, "I'm sure he'll allow it once you polish the
theory just a bit more."</p>
<p>Harry laughed bitterly. "Oh no," he said, "Snape was very clear. I can't brew it.
Not now, not ever. Months of research, out the window!"</p>
<p>Angrily, he slammed the parchment onto the table and sat down with a frustrated
sigh.</p>
<p>"Well, what did he say?" Ron asked, unsure of what he could contribute to a highly
academic problem.</p>
<p>"He said it's dangerous and dark," Harry said flatly, "And that there was no way
to drink this safely."</p>
<p>The three Gryffindors shared a look and Harry narrowed his eyes.</p>
<p>"What?" he growled.</p>
<p>"Well," Ginny started, "It's just that Snape is a well-respected Potions Master.
He probably knows what he's talking about."</p>
<p>"How can you say that?" Harry asked, angrily getting to his feet again, "You're
supposed to be on my side."</p>
<p>"We are!" Ginny countered, "And so is Snape. We just don't want you to get
hurt."</p>
<p>For a second, Harry felt his chest tighten with a twinge of guilt when he
remembered what he had said well more like yelled to Snape before storming out.
It was cruel, especially when Snape was indeed just looking out for him. But then his
disappointment came washing back over him and swept his guilt away like the ocean
would footprints in the sand.</p>
<p>"Fine," he scowled, turning his back on the three traitors. "I can see how it
is."</p>
<p>"Harry " Ginny started, reaching out to him.</p>
<p>"Don't," Harry spat at her, "I need to be alone for a while."</p>
<p>And with this theorem under his arm, he left the Gryffindor tower once more,
swiftly losing hope of being treated fairly. But perhaps, there was one more person
that could help Snape see the light. Steeling his resolve once more, Harry headed
towards Dumbledore's office.</p>
<hr size="1" noshade="noshade"/>
<p>Harry was about ready to blast that gargoyle to pieces when it refused to allow
him entrance for the umpteenth time. Harry had named every sweet he had ever
encountered, be it muggle or wizard and the blasted thing still wouldn't open.</p>
<p>Just when Harry was on the verge of pulling out his hair, the gargoyle finally
moved, revealing Dumbledore waiting at the top of the stairs.</p>
<p>"Come on up, my boy," he said loudly, "It would not do for you to blast the
hallway to pieces."</p>
<p>Harry mumbled something under his breath about ancient headmasters but made his
way up anyway. When he entered Dumbledore's office, he was surprised to find Slughorn
seated there already. The man greeted him warmly and Harry reciprocated politely.</p>
<p>"The password is simply 'milky way'," Dumbledore informed Harry, "But I asked
Archibald not to allow anyone entrance while I am up here with Horace. Of course, I
didn't account for one very upset potioneer in training to grace me with his
presence."</p>
<p>"Archibald?" Harry asked.</p>
<p>"The gargoyle, Harry," Dumbledore chuckled, "Have a lemon drop."</p>
<p>"No thank you, sir," Harry said dryly.</p>
<p>"Very well," Dumbledore conceded, "Now how may I help you?"</p>
<p>Harry glanced over at Slughorn, not sure if he should speak with the man present
but Dumbledore waved his concerns aside.</p>
<p>"If this is about anything to do with your apprenticeship, I assure you that
Horace is more than capable to enlighten you with his insights. Two heads are better
than one, as I always say."</p>
<p>Harry shrugged. Maybe Slughorn would be on his side and would be able to come up
with a way to help Harry, even if Snape couldn't or wouldn't.</p>
<p>"He won't allow me to brew my potion," Harry explained, placing his theorem on
Dumbledore's desk. Slughorn took it immediately and started leafing through it but
Dumbledore simply steepled his fingers and smiled warmly as he listened to Harry.</p>
<p>"I've been working on this for months," Harry repeated for the third time that
day, "And now Snape won't even allow me to go forward with this. I mean, I know there
are some errors in there and I mean full well to correct them but I really don't
think this will be as dangerous as he makes it out to be.</p>
<p>"Do you feel that Professor Snape is treating you unfairly?" Dumbledore asked.</p>
<p>Harry sighed in frustration. "No," he said, "Not on purpose anyway but I think
that he lets his personal feelings get in the way."</p>
<p>"Harry, this is brilliant!" Slughorn exclaimed after a short while as he thumbed
through the list of ingredients and regarded the formula carefully. "There might be
some consistency errors here and there but you could really make this work. This
could very well be the discovery of the century!"</p>
<p>Harry felt his disappointment and anger diminish somewhat while Slughorn gushed
over his theorem. At least there was someone who saw its potential.</p>
<p>"Horace," Dumbledore said gently, "Would you kindly leave Harry and I alone to
talk for a while? We shall revisit our own discussion at a later date."</p>
<p>"Are you sure, headmaster?" Slughorn asked, "I'm sure I could be of value if
"</p>
<p>But Dumbledore held up a calm hand, stopping every objection Slughorn could have.
When Dumbledore regarded you with the look in his eye that he had now, you knew that
you should make yourself scarce. And so Slughorn fled Dumbledore's office but not
without squeezing Harry's shoulder reassuringly as he left.</p>
<p>"Harry," Dumbledore said warmly, the sparkle in his eyes already back at full
force. "You and I have faced each other many times in the past. Be it in this office,
the hospital ward or anywhere else. But it has occurred to me that we have never had
a professional conversation before. Before anything else, I want you to know how
pleased I am to know that there is now room in your life for these sorts of problems.
Your life is no longer focused solely on the destruction of Voldemort and so we can
move on to more pleasant conversation."</p>
<p>Dumbledore sighed solemnly as he glanced over Harry's theorem and Fawkes thrilled
sadly in accordance.</p>
<p>"And yet it would appear that Voldemort still influences your life somewhat,"
Dumbledore continued, "If only through the absence of the people you deserve to have
here for you."</p>
<p>"He doesn't run my life, sir," Harry objected quietly, "These choices are my
own."</p>
<p>"There is no shame in being shaped by the life you've lived, Harry," Dumbledore
said, "Even if there was a great deal of sadness in yours. I hope you don't
misunderstand me. Voldemort is in no way dictating your actions from this life or the
next, but our experiences shape us. And yours have shaped a longing for what might
have been. I am sad to admit that I too am sometimes plagued by such notions."</p>
<p>"Which is why I want to brew this potion," Harry said earnestly.</p>
<p>"Allow me to give you some grandfatherly advice," Dumbledore said as he laid out
the pieces of parchment next to one another as if he was making an overcomplicated
puzzle.</p>
<p>"Your journey into attaining this mastery has only scarcely begun. And you will
encounter many pitfalls along the way. It is only natural that you require direction
to follow this path correctly but when I look at your theorem I sense that this is
something you still lack, as do any young pioneers such as yourself. You don't lack
knowledge. Of that, I can see the proof right here. But you have to gain that sense
of direction to even begin going anywhere."</p>
<p>"Because Harry," Dumbledore added with a knowing look in his eyes. "It is not the
destination that matters, it's the journey that takes us there."</p>
<p>Feeling somewhat deflated, Harry leaned back into his chair, actually grabbing a
lemon drop.</p>
<p>"So I suppose that you think Snape is right?"</p>
<p>"<em>Professor</em> Snape, Harry," Dumbledore chided lightly, "And you would do
well to remember that he is your mentor and far more knowledgeable than you are at
this stage."</p>
<p>Harry sighed in defeat.</p>
<p>"Having said that, I don't agree that you should simply discard your entire
project and start anew."</p>
<p>Harry's green eyes filled with hope. "Do you mean that I could still make this
work?"</p>
<p>"I certainly believe so, Harry," Dumbledore said, "For now, you should probably
leave your project to simmer. There is no shame in that, you know? I have projects
going on that I have let simmer for decades simply to give myself some time to think
it over."</p>
<p>Dumbledore chuckled at the horrified look Harry gave him.</p>
<p>"Not that I had that in mind for you, my boy," he assured him, "But I do think you
should put a halt to this potion until you've mastered Occlumency."</p>
<p>Harry actually snorted at that. "Professor?" he asked, "I feel like that's neither
here nor there."</p>
<p>Dumbledore smiled knowingly. "Trust me on this, Harry," he said gently, "And tell
Severus what I said. I'm sure he will adjust his opinion accordingly."</p>
<p>"Alright," Harry said doubtfully as he took his cue to leave, forgetting to take
this theorem with him.</p>
<hr size="1" noshade="noshade"/>
<p>Harry felt slightly better after the conversation with Dumbledore but was not
looking forward to facing Snape just yet. He had said something admittedly horrible
to the Potions Master, even though the man was obviously only trying to help. Sure,
he hadn't needed to be so dramatic about it but Harry's reaction was still over the
top.</p>
<p>In fact, it was reactions like that, that had made it so bloody difficult for
Harry to master Occlumency. He was fine as long as he wasn't emotional but those
times were rare indeed. It was a good thing he hadn't been sorted into Slytherin way
back when. He wouldn't have lasted a week surrounded by the cool and collected
personas of Snape's house.</p>
<p>Harry walked all the way back to the dungeons, passing Professor Bell on his way
to Snape's personal quarters. He stopped for a moment to help her out.</p>
<p>"Are you lost again, Professor?" Harry asked.</p>
<p>"Oh Harry, thank Goodness," Bell said, "Good to see you. I'm afraid that I can't
find the staircase to the second floor."</p>
<p>"You wouldn't down here, Professor," Harry said, "We're in the dungeons. You need
to go all the way back until you see the doors to the great hall and take a
right."</p>
<p>"That sounds easy enough," Bell said, smiling thankfully. "But where are you
going?"</p>
<p>"To see Professor Snape," Harry sighed with a somewhat haunted look in his eyes.
Bell frowned slightly at that. "Anyway, good luck, Professor!" Harry exclaimed before
turning the corner that led to Snape's personal quarters.</p>
<p>He was about to knock on the door when he heard loud voices come from within.</p>
<p>"I can't believe you would keep Harry from personal growth, Severus!" Came the
unmistakable voice of Slughorn. "This potion is nothing short of genius."</p>
<p>"I will not endanger his life and mind for the completion of a potion, no matter
how brilliant it might be," Snape countered strongly.</p>
<p>"Sometimes you need to take chances to improve yourself," Slughorn said.</p>
<p>"Not at this stage," Snape growled, "Not when he's still learning to find his own
way."</p>
<p>Then Slughorn said something indiscernible to which Snape replied; "Above anything
else, he's still my son."</p>
<p>Harry swallowed thickly and knocked on the door, tired of eavesdropping. It took a
few seconds longer than normal for Snape to beckon him to come in and when he did,
Harry opened the door slowly and doubtfully.</p>
<p>"Come in, Harry," Snape sighed when the boy kept dawdling at the door, "Professor
Slughorn was just leaving."</p>
<p>Slughorn made a noise in the back of his throat and glared at Snape who was
completely undeterred by the shorter man's gaze. He then turned to Harry and sighed
solemnly.</p>
<p>"I'm sorry Harry," he said, "I tried."</p>
<p>And he left as Harry stood there somewhat awkwardly.</p>
<p>"Looks like I'm not the only one with a sense of the melodramatic today," he said
painfully as he shuffled his feet.</p>
<p>Snape regarded him before turning to face the fire.</p>
<p>"Sit down, Harry," he said curtly. Harry was glad to find no anger or resentment
in Snape's voice. The poorly disguised hurt on his face cut Harry deeply, though.</p>
<p>"I'm sorry," Harry blurted out as he hastily sat down in accordance with Snape's
command. "I shouldn't have said what I said."</p>
<p>"No, you shouldn't have," Snape said softly. He had his hands clasped behind his
back as he gazed into the flames. Anxiously, Harry licked his lips, his hands playing
with a stray thread of his cloak.</p>
<p>"I was upset," Harry said, "But it was still wrong of me. I really <em>am</em>
sorry."</p>
<p>This time Snape faced Harry and found the boy sitting there, resigned to his fate.
He sighed softly.</p>
<p>"I forgive you, Harry," he said, "Though I do not condone your behaviour in the
least. I will have you know that many accomplished masters have started projects that
months or sometimes even years later proved to be useless or simply too dangerous to
ever use or even brew. This <em>will</em> happen again."</p>
<p>"I understand sir," Harry acknowledged.</p>
<p>There was a moment of silence in which Snape regarded Harry carefully.</p>
<p>"I realize you visited with the headmaster," Snape then said softly, "And
Professor Slughorn as well. Did you hope that they would overturn my decision?"</p>
<p>"Well, yes and no," Harry admitted honestly, "I didn't expect to find Slughorn
there but Dumbledore didn't send him away. I never meant to include him. I did hope
that Dumbledore might talk to you and have you come up with a solution."</p>
<p>Snape sneered, "And how did that work out for you?"</p>
<p>"Well " Harry started, not sure how Snape would take this mad suggestion.</p>
<p>"Out with it," Snape snarled, crossing his arms tightly.</p>
<p>"He suggested that I master occlumency."</p>
<p>For a moment, Snape's face was frozen in a mask of disbelief and Harry wondered
idly if he should floo the hospital wing. But then, the Potions Master shook his head
incredulously, smiling as he did so.</p>
<p>"That brilliant old man," he muttered, seemingly forgetting that Harry was still
in the room. "Occlumency, of course! It is that simple."</p>
<p>He started pacing in front of the fireplace. Harry had to tuck in his legs, afraid
that Snape would trip over them if he didn't.</p>
<p>"It's rather genius, really," Snape continued muttering, "If one could lock down
their mind while still allowing for but that would also mean that "</p>
<p>"Professor?" Harry interrupted.</p>
<p>Snape stopped his pacing and looked at his charge with interest and excitement in
his eyes.</p>
<p>"Harry," he said solemnly, "It appears that this time, you truly <em>will</em>
need to master occlumency."</p>
<hr size="1" noshade="noshade"/>
<p><em>I know what you're thinking! Damn, MS. Occlumency again? I thought you
abandoned that idea altogether? But no sirree, here it is! Back for more. How do you
all expect this to go? I hope you'll look forward to what comes next. And please,
please throw me a review!</em></p>
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